Only Two Motivations in Life

     It could be disputed ad nauseam what are the true motivations in life. In trying to reduce the complexities, it could be separated by Jungian v. Freudian concepts. It could be limited to male v. female responses to life, in general. It could be expanded to define the myriad complexities developed in theory to define the particular neuroses that afflict one's mental constitution, and then, perhaps, taking a lifetime to work out. 

     Or, it could be simplified. There are only two driving motivations in life that govern our behaviors. They are either Love or Fear. Simply stated. One or the other. Now you know. 

Oprah just let us know the most googled word on the internet. Know what it is? 

Love. 

     It is no surprise to me that this word captured our most earnest desire to know its meaning. In finding love, we find acceptance. In that acceptance, we feel at peace. It doesn't matter the source, although nearly all can be traced to either mom or dad. In a broader sense, where anyone is struggling with accepting the relationship, it could go so far as the idea of being accepted by God. At any rate, if we sense that we are loved, it follows that we experience acceptance and are, therefore, at peace. Makes me think of the expression, God is in His heaven and all is right with the world.

     One of my favorite quotes comes from Rita Rudner: Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them....

     Upon first hearing this, I laughed heartily. But this observation has stayed with me over the years developing more significance as the years have passed. Being quite the neurotic myself, I could associate with my castle in the air. Very often the psychotic living in it was the same person cleaning it as I watched the maniacal behavior in my imaginary split-level head. 

     I have had my share of fun with the diversions of mental complexities that drive my behaviors, not the least of which borders on paranoia. But I now know that can all be encompassed in fear. Fear has been defined as the acronym that represents False Evidence Appearing Real. While I like that reduction, it hardly serves a purpose when I find myself in the throws of terrifying fear. Yet, recently immersing myself in this latest phase of terror going on in my life, I realize that my fear is the result of a lack of the supporting love that would go a long way to allow me to feel an integral part of my own existence. Cue the music, "...where is love? Does it fall from skies above? Is it underneath the willow tree, that I've been dreaming of? "

     Having once been an identical twin, now living without my other half has left me to unwind that bond that has had me wrapped a little too tight. When I look at what makes me ME these days, I am profoundly aware that I long to gravitate toward a loving life. Yet there is much on a daily basis that can pull me from those gentle and loving feelings toward my fellow person.  Especially when I have been done wrong by my fellow person. I certainly can identify their behaviors in the immediate; generally, all fear based. Example: just recently being fired by a rather tasteless corporation that allows its most fundamental controls to be handled by imbeciles in the field, despite the company's lofty ideas of integrity.

      It is clear to me that this economy has been a ripe opportunity to couch attrition under the guise of a downturn. A hiring freeze followed by a systematic elimination of personnel is a most convenient means to reduce the first and most easily controlled controllable. I have joined the elite team known as The Expendables. I have had to contend with the reality that I am no less the grand and wonderful person I was performing to the best of my abilities for this monolith. Just because they have chosen to become opportunistic does not diminish my expertise, in spite of how this experience has put a dent in my own sense of loftiness. 

     While I am worried, in fact, terrified by the lack of prospects, I have had to contend with the fact that I choose not to become a less loving soul as a result of the ills of this particularly unsavory corporation. It is merely a microcosm of what the entire world is undergoing right now to varying degrees and blatant transgressions. Why? Well, I surmise that fearing the volatile uncertainties of the incumbent, universally economic mood-swing, we once again have an area of rampant abuses that cannot be recorded because of their emotional characteristics. There is no metric for this. Just the remnants of those left out of the loop climbing toward 10%.

     I am put in mind of another humorous, yet no less salient point made by none other than Groucho Marx himself: I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.

     This is my default premise as I reconstruct my approach to surviving on this planet. The last thing I would want to do is make the same mistake and go work for a company that has such poor respect for its workforce as to subject them to the systematic elimination of their fiscal headaches. Human resources, me eye! Why I oughta'....
      I should have quit much earlier but I chose to trust that there was love at the root of their motivations. In this situation, I discovered the depth of their collective fears. Well, after all, there are  only humans running the day-to-day operations and most recently one of their own training facilitators openly admitted they were real good at one thing: managing out their valuable human resources. As part of their managing team, I prided myself on the fact that I would not reduce myself to such tactics. It had not occurred to me that they would pull this on me. 

     So as I embark on this next chapter in the midst of a fearful planet and a very questionable future, I vow to keep my heart open. If it is my aim to operate from love; I must not put up any walls around my heart that would keep me from receiving the robust gifts that come from love. As I walk forward I am in mind of yet another author, Emmet Fox and his poem about Love:

There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer;

No disease that enough love will not heal;

No door that enough love will not open;

No gulf that enough love will not bridge;

No wall that enough love will not throw down;

No sin that enough love will not redeem...

It makes no difference how deeply seated may be the trouble,

How hopeless the outlook,

How muddled the tangle,

How great the mistake -- 

A sufficient realization of love will dissolve it all...

If only you could love enough, you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the world.